Rudolph
by MonkeyPajamas
Summary: Jane remembers something about the holidays. Was supposed to be holiday fluff. Came out way less happy than I planed.


Jane entered the FBI office, escaping the bitter cold outside. A few weeks ago, she'd appreciated the cooler weather, a welcome change from the stifling heat that was inescapable in the city. But the nice, mild temperatures of fall had given way to the bitter cold of winter, and Jane had decided that she hated winter and the icy cold and snowy mush that covered the outside.

"Hey, Rudolph," Reade joked, as she entered the office.

Jane felt something inside her flare up. She could tell Reade's tone was joking, but something instinctual made her feel threatened. "What did you say?" she countered, her voice harsh.

"Your nose is red, from the cold. Like Rudolph – you know – the reindeer." Reade explained, sorry he'd ever made the joke. Sometimes, it just wasn't worth the effort to joke with Jane.

Jane glared at him, still not able to let whatever she was feeling go. She walked past, to the locker room, and glanced in the mirror. She gingerly touched her nose – it was still a bright red. _Yet another reason to hate winter_ , she thought. It was as if her skin kept thinking of ways to betray her.

A few minutes later, Weller entered. "Jane?" he asked, hesitantly, when he saw her standing in front of the mirror.

"What's Rudolph?" Jane asked, trying to keep her voice from wavering.

"Rudolph? Jane, what are you talking about?" Weller was confused. Was this a new case? A new connection from one of her tattoos? Why would Jane be upset by that?

"Reade called me Rudolph. It made me angry… but I don't know why. I just hate winter – everything about it."

Weller chuckled. He could see the look of betrayal flash in Jane's eyes, and calmed down, before he upset her more. He smiled at Jane. "Rudolph the Red Nosed Reindeer. It's a Christmas song."

"What?"

"Rudolph, the red nosed reindeer,

Had a very shiny nose…

And if you ever saw it, saw it,

You would even say it glowed.." Weller sang, feeling slightly embarrassed.

Jane froze as a memory overtook her.

 _A small girl, laughs as she plays in the snow. Someone calls to her, and hands her a pair of antlers. She smiles, placing it on her head, and sings the song "Rudolph the Red Nosed Reindeer, had a very shiny nose!"_ Her memory fades, as the song blends between memory and present day.

"Jane? Jane?" Weller's eyes looked into hers as he tried to figure out what she was thinking.

"Did I.." Jane starts, unsure of how to continue… "I remembered something."

"What? About Rudolph?"

Jane struggled to find the words. It was the first time she remembered something from when she was young – from when she was Taylor. Was it even a young Kurt, just on the edge of her memory, handing her the antlers? "I was playing in the snow. And then, I had these antlers…"

Kurt's face softened, as his memories came back also. "You were a reindeer in a class play. It was all you could talk about for weeks. You would practice singing all day. Most of the time, you would just be shouting the words. We could hear you, even when we were inside the house. You would be singing Christmas carols at the top of your lungs."

Jane's mind raced, desperately trying to connect the dots, to fill in the scene with what Kurt had said and what she had seen. Seeing that little girl, little Jane (Taylor, she corrected), shouting Christmas carols so loud they could be heard next door. She wanted to know how that shadowy figure was, the one who handed her the antlers. The more she tried to remember, the flimsier the memory seemed – now she wasn't even sure what was real or not.

"Hey guys, we got something," Reade opened the door to the locker room, noticing Weller and Jane staring at each other, lost in their own world. "And, Jane, sorry about earlier – you good?" He added, feeling slightly guilty.

"Oh, uh… yeah," Jane managed to get out, still lost in the memories. "I just.." she let the sentence drop. They had a job to do.

* * *

This started because I was listening to Christmas music, and wanted to write something fluffy. My first time writing Blindspot fic, and this is what came out. I could even be forgetting something from canon. Oh well.

Obviously, I don't own Blindspot, or anything else of importance.

Oh, and BTW - I don't know if I actually believe Jane is Taylor. But I figure the memory could work either way.


End file.
